I finally sorted out my thoughts. Ok, maybe they are not sorted. They are just slightly unraveled.

Why was I so frustrated?

Because...

Because...

Because...I feel that I really don't know this guy one bit. This guy that I think I kind of have some affection for.

And if I don't know him, how can I like him?

I must be out of my mind. I must be.

...

And guess what. Charlie could tell who this chap is.

Isn't he just amazing?! His perceptive ability took me by surprise.

But well, I would have expected him to know anyway. If we were to exchange positions, and I witness a similar situation, I would probably have thought as he had thought.

We look at things the same way. There is no doubt about it.

...

At the end of it, I don't even know what I should do about it.

I think, if I just let things take its course, as I have been doing all along, we have potential. I really think we do.

I don't know if we will make a great pair though.

But...the way it is, I cannot help but wonder,

maybe it is narcissism I am experiencing. Maybe all along, I am in love, with myself.

Which is extremely ironic because I don't love myself. Not one bit.

But seriously, all along, I have only seen him the way I thought he is. And it is only now that I realize, I know so little about him.

Which makes me crushed.

But where do I take it off from here?

...

I haven't figured that out.