It was just a normal comment. Another normal exchange over MSN.

But it was enough to make me realize just what I needed to know.

It is funny how God sends such little messages across the span of our daily life activities. Well, I can't say for sure God meant for that as an answer to my question but it seems to make sense.

What was I thinking about when I thought about telling him how I feel?

I was assuming that...we could be possible? I was assuming he felt something for me?

What if my assumptions were wrong? What if...

What if I have always been looked upon only as a good friend?

...

You see. I have always thought he did things for me because he likes me.

Ha.

Maybe I overrated myself. Well, I guess...

But I learnt last night that wasn't the case. Whatever he has done for me, would be whatever he would do for anyone who he looks upon as a friend.

Those handphone greetings. The advice.

The lozenges. The book.

It is a good gesture that he cares so much for his friends. At the same time, it is enough for me to know just what I need to do.

...

Stop thinking so much.

Stop thinking about the question he has posed to me because there is no point thinking about it.

Why bother at all? Why lose sleep over it?

...Gosh. I can't believe I am no naive.

...

He said I am easily touched. I really can't help but agree.

Because I am so easily touched, I mistook his gestures. Well, shame on me. Shame shame on me.

...

I don't think I need a person to look after me.

And no, I don't think I need another person in my life right now.

Although yes, I do crave for a shoulder sometimes. And sometimes, a hug.

But no, I don't need a guy to give me that.

Whatever is meant to be, will come eventually.

...

Maybe he is not the one for me after all.

Hee. Contradictory le, me.

Ye, that is me. Like it or not. Me. Contradictory. Me. Temperamental. Me. Jovial. Me.